all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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