i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
