She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Randomize
