how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
