one might say we're banned from that church
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Randomize
