Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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