I can't breathe out the right side of my face
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
