Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
