and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
