My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
