i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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