her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
