quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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