Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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