i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Text me some of your sweat
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
