Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I am mentally ready for anal.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
