he shaved USA in his pubs
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I need a hoe opinion
go on
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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