im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
