at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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