im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
