Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
God, I missed his penis.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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