Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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