Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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