I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize