so let's talk penis.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
