you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
My vagina is very pro this idea
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize