I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
