Grow some girl-balls and come out already
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
