jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
