found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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