Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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