dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
