'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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