so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
