Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
