I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
