This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
