I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
