he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
