You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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