i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Randomize
