You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
