I've blown a few things in my day
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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