My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
