How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
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