I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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