4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
