I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
