He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Operation Purity has been aborted
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
