I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
