I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Randomize
